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One school district at a time

I’m passing along a note that those of us who are members of Our Family Coalition, Northern California’s LGBT Family organization, received on Saturday. It’s huge news.

We’re painfully aware of the resistance to LGBT family- and gender- diversity in K-12 curricula elsewhere, even locally.  Alameda Unified School District is 10 short miles south of here, and in a whole different ball park.  (Last year I reported on their fight here; though the anti-bias anti-bullying curriculum was passed, it’s continued to encounter resistance, now at the law suit level.)  But those of us who know the Berkeley Unified School District would expect it to recognize and support this sort of social justice-minded, community-minded curriculum, what with its storied history as the first school district of its size in the nation to voluntarily desegregate, in 1968.  Forty years later, it’s still as committed.

Regardless of political pedigree, however, any school board can only be as forward-thinking as the community it sits in, and all of us with kids in the schools here owe a huge an incalculable debt of gratitude to those at OFC and in the school district whose long, hard work made this happen.

Much more to say about this in the future, but for the moment, just the good news:

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Some kid’s lit questions for the hive mind

In which I ask you all for your collective insights, which I know to be legion, and which I ask after all too rarely.

This Thursday evening I’ll be talking to our former (and future!) preschool director’s Children’s Literature class.  It’s offered for early childhood educators who are in the process of getting their credentials, and I was honored (up the wazoo) to have been asked by her to talk to them last year, too.  All must have went well enough, since she asked me a second time.

The talk was about family diversity — specifically LGBT family diversity — in literature for children. I did some amateur sleuthing, some book list compiling (so many sources!), some talking to librarians and some checking out from both the public library and our family’s library. Handouts with lengthy book lists were procured (when I update the compilation for this week’s presentation, I’ll include a post here at LD, ideally incorporating the list into a more comprehensive LD link page). The outline of the talk went  like this:

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She’s in her red, confused period

confusedprincess

At least we don’t have to worry right now about the girlie concealing her true feelings from us.

Yesterday — Day 2 of Kindergarten — they drew a little something at some point. The title of this piece is “Confused Princess,” and she is, as you might imagine, confused. I’d say a tad distressed too, but I don’t want to read too much into it.

What was she confused about? We didn’t get a straight answer about that. Not like it was necessary.

What’s that big figure behind her?

“It’s her shadow, but she doesn’t know what it is. She’s a little bit worried, and a little bit– ‘What’s going on?!’”

[Ed note: adjusted to reflect actual quote which I scribbled down on a piece of paper at the time and didn't have with me when I posted this initially.]

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Pre-school

We are at Preschool Graduation Day (PGD) minus one day and counting. Midday Wednesday,  the beloved and I will be all teary-eyed, watching our girlie standing in a line with a dozen or so of her little mates, singing songs of joy and peace, accompanied by those hand gestures that are such a fantastic nemonic device for the young, and just insufferably adorable to the old.

Our daughter, by contrast, will be dry-eyed and thinking about the next verse, or about how her undies keep riding up her booty, or about how isn’t that a Steller’s Jay chattering up there in the tree? Maybe she’ll just be thinking how sentimental her parents seem to be, and wondering whether we’ll be carrying on like this for every other graduation, too. The answer to which question would probably be: yep.

After I picked her up from preschool yesterday (one more day to go! have I mentioned?), I suggested we take a quick jaunt to her new elementary school, which she okayed immediately and even with a touch of frisson, if you can frisson at 4.9 yrs old. The pretext for the visit was for me to test out the drive time, to & fro our home. Sure,  late at night — and more than once — I’d already done that. But did she need to know?

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11th of 21

[Ed. note, re: post title. I'm supposedly doing a month of photo-only posts, of which this would be the 12th. I slipped.  Again.  And the danged Supreme Court hasn't even tipped its hand yet.]

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Alameda parent Karie Frasch, holding a picture of her family: partner Barbara, daughters Amelia and Charolette. 

I came home from the Alameda School Board meeting close to midnight (I write this in the wee hours), and found my daughter already crawled into our bed, her arm entwined with my beloved’s arm, both their heads inclined in the same direction. In his crib my son looked, as he always does when he sleeps, like he was plucked directly from a 16th century painting of cherubim and seraphim,  hastily clad in 21st century jammies.

As I looked at these people I am giving my life to, and would do so over and over again if given the opportunity, I found it utterly impossible to reconcile the words I heard from opponent after opponent of the Caring Schools Curriculum.  

The “carryover” meeting was scheduled to enable the 100+ people to speak who wanted to but couldn’t at the meeting to consider the curriculum last week.  It began at 6:30pm and ended somewhere deep into the next month, it seemed, and was a microcosm of how this whole LGBT/ family diversity curriculum battle is shaping up around here right now.  Only a more or less civil version of it.  

Sadly, some of the less civil part of the evening came from the curriculum’s supporters, in the way of occasional “boos” and hissing at some of the opposition speakers;  one rather lathered up man popped a spring, and essentially begged to be ejected when he felt the procedures for speakers had been circumvented.  I didn’t hear the man in the devil costume the first week, but this week he was in civilian clothing, and the lathered up chap from the curriculum supporter’s side made a cameo in his role. 

Still, the civility on the the opposition’s part was civil only in the “f#ck you very much” sense.  It’s the Miss CA school of charm: “No offense!  But you’re offensive!” Its version last night: “I think you’re morally objectionable and I wish you’d just disappear, and I’m not really thinking about your kids at all; not in the least! But I’m all for tolerance!”  It’s an incivility that is appalling in its utter simplicity, in its naked unselfconsciousness. 

There’s so much to this, and I want to try to render it in more subtle detail. I hope to soon, but this wee hour is not the one in which to do more than paint a few broad strokes. 

Broadly: at the core seems to me to be an utter, absolute, intractable, final conviction that a people (my people) are simply wrong. Because I can’t figure what else to call it, when it’s something others say they are opposed to, something they just “don’t agree with.”  As if one might somehow disagree with the weather, or or disagree with left-handedness.

Where does this leave our children? You tell me.

At the core — deeper by far than the myriad misunderstandings and misinformation regarding the anti-bias, anti-bullying curriculum already in place, to which this would be a supplement, by request of teachers who wanted some tools to use in their classes where they saw harassment and ignorance taking root — at the core seems to be a conviction that it’s a moral issue.  And I agree that reflecting the family structures and truths of all the kids in a classroom is absolutely an ethical, perhaps even a moral issue.  

But that’s not what opponents seeing as “moral” — what’s moral is sexuality, and heterosexuality is moral, and homosexuality is immoral.  The logical extension is that, therefore, our children, as the children of immoral people, should never see their families referred to in class, and even more, should reference ever be made to their families, other kids’ parents need notice so that they can remove their children from class before such mention is made.  

The spectacular irony of the night was that the more the opposition argued that the subject should be removed from schools — that is, the more they insisted, in so many words, on our public invisibility during our kids’ formative years — the more urgently obvious was the need for that very visibility.  One extremely moving gay dad implored the board, “We are not looking for special treatment. We are trying to exist. I’ve got a thick skin, but my child does not, and I need your help on this.”

I took page upon page of notes, and as of page 24 (it was a small pocket notebook), I just wrote at the bottom: “No. Hope.”

Not “no hope” that we’ll ever move on this; I think we will, somehow, battling every inch of the way.  But at that point — as of page 24, must have been well past 10:00pm — I had no hope that any of the opponents of that curriculum in that room would ever really see us.  I mean really.  See.  Us.

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Coda / Action Alert:

Though Pacific Justice Institute founder and president Brad Dacus did not speak tonight — for better or worse, most of the opposition was from one Alameda demographic — he is far from silent on the issue of what’s under consideration in the Alameda schools.  

THIS MORNING he will be debating Groundspark’s Debra Chasnoff (filmmaker of “That’s a Family,” a key part of the curriculum) on conservative talk show The Laura Ingram Show.  THIS MORNING — at 11:15 am Eastern, 9:15 am Central, 8:15 am  Pacific Standard Time.  

Please call in and voice your support of LGBT-inclusive curriculum; though the conflict in Alameda is the jumping-off point, the larger topic is the relevance of this curricula everywhere: if the battle royale hasn’t come to your town yet, it will, and we all need to be all over this.  

The Laura Ingram Show will open up comment to callers from around the country, and (particularly because of its conservative audience) it’s important to have some supportive voices call in.  You can listen live at http://1260.am/programming/listen/ ; the number to call is 800-876-4123.


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East Bay schools in right wing crosshairs

Now that the big right wing guns have been brought in and the news has spread to local television news and  the Associated Press, it’s time I posted something on the (anti)gay storm brewing in the town of my youth.

I’m interested because it’s a battle over the presence of gay people and conversations about us in the public schools, something that, as of the start of our daughter’s Kindergarten year this fall, will become huge in our lives.  (And we’ve got it good: we’re going to a school that has an out lesbian principal, a school that has seen some positive work on family diversity curriculum.  But members of the school’s PTA, when asked about the climate of the school for gay families in a prospective parents’ Q/A about the school, said something to the effect of, “We’ve done plenty of work in that area. Some of us think too much.”  Another parent quipped once — totally good-naturedly — that it was the “lesbian magnet” school.  Of over 230 families, how many are out as same-sex headed? Five. This is a good school, in a good district.)

I’m also interested because it’s clear that aside from service in the military, and access to the rights and privileges of state-recognized marriage, family diversity and anti-bullying curricula in the schools are where the battles against (and for) my people are being fought these days.  

And I’m interested because one of the epicenters of this battle locally is my high school alma mater.  (I frankly hope that the estimable Dr. Maddow might become interested, too, for a “Holy Mackerel” bit, or more: it’s her high school alma mater, too.)

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More on Alameda’s Caring Schools Curriculum

Alrighty, so this is quite the non-photo post in the midst of my photo-only post month.  Again, forgive me.  If I could have, I would have included shots of the person wearing the devil costume speaking to the Wednesday Alameda Unified School District school board, testifying as to how all will go to perdition if tolerance for family and gender diversity is included in the school district’s curriculum.  But I’m kind of glad that image is not burned into my brain.

Before I go on, I’ll also note my stakes in the matter: I’m not a resident of Alameda, and my kids will be going to school in neighboring Berkeley Unified.  However, I grew up a stone’s throw from Alameda, over the decades have spent many a “tourist” dollar there, worked a long time for outreach programs looking to improve the college educational prospects of K-12 kids in underserved schools throughout the Bay Area, and am a proud product of the public school system of the East Bay, K-16.  When my high school basketball team got lucky and extended our reach beyond our immediate local competitors, we sometimes played Alameda HS.  Usually lost.  Probably because Rachel Maddow wouldn’t be on our team for another ten years.  Another story.

But: my interest in what’s happening in AUSD — and yours, too — is this: history has shown that right wing anti-gay organizations fight these curricula tooth and nail, and are emboldened by one win to go on to attack them in neighboring school districts.  This AUSD curriculum development process has been a slow, careful one, and it’s wronger than wrong for a busload of zealots from way outside the Bay Area to come and overwhelm a local process. Which is just what happened on Wednesday night.

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Action Alert: REALLY support safe schools in Alameda*

* UPDATE: The venue for the “Carryover” Board meeting has been changed to accomodate what’s expected to be larger crowds.  The Carryover School Board meeting will be held Monday at 6:30pm at Alameda Unified School District’s Kofman Auditorium, 2200 Central Avenue, Alameda, CA.  Google map here.  Peaceful vigil beforehand from 5pm on (see next post for further details).

AUSD School Board President Mike McMahon keeps a well-stocked website and has archived the whole debate here, including links to parents’ groups for and against the curriculum, and testimony heard at the May 12 meeting.  Anyone planning to go who hasn’t already been a part of the safe schools work in AUSD should read up on the matter at the Alameda C.A.R.E. (Community Alliance Resource for Education) website.

I wrote yet more on this later today, here at “More on Alameda’s Caring Schools Curriculum”

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groundspark

Remember earlier in the week — like, Wednesday — I passed along an action alert about a School Board meeting in Alameda (a town in the East Bay of the San Francisco Bay Area)?  Well.  I finally got a report on the meeting, and it seems that the topic of safe schools and anti-bullying curriculum in Alameda indeed got into the crosshairs of right wing activists.

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